Life in Zootopia: Felinus

The Canyonlands, one of Zootopia’s many themed districts formed along the massive temperature barrier that separated Tundra Town and Sahara Square. The name definitely was definitely a fitting one, the entire district existing in deep cracks, crags, crevices, seemingly carved into the earthy stone of Zootopia over thousands of years….course, seeing as this was Zootopia, an absolute modern marvel of mammal engineering, it was possible that the district could have been created artificially. Regardless of how the district came to be, the mammals that called the place home didn’t seem to have many complaints, the canyons were certainly unique, hot sun…and even hotter air blown from the giant air conditioner dividing wall flooded the district, but down in the canyon things were slightly cooler. The stone tended to be cooler than the air, the shade provided by outcroppings and the high walls offered relief…if you liked a nice little balance of hot and cold, didn’t mind the fact that nearly every loud sound in the canyon would probably end up echoing through the entire district…and didn’t mind living in a deep crag in the earth, which in turn was likely an ancient dried up riverbed that could…hypothetically speaking…become one massive floodplain in a worst case scenario…then the Canyonlands might just be the perfect home for you!

Now the Canyonlands is by no means one of the largest district Zootopia, in fact, it might be one of the smallest districts in the entire city. Regardless of its size, the district was populated with many mammals’ homes and businesses, many of which were carved into the famous stone cold walls of the district. Those caves carved into the canyon walls often times tended to be even cooler than the rest of the Canyons…a strange sensation for being so close to a wall that literally blasted burning hot temperatures into the district all day every day. Despite being such a small district, the Canyonlands still has its own minor inner districts, one of note being a small stretch of canyons known as Coyote Canyon, a hot spot for mammals such as…well…the name pretty much speaks for itself. But just because a place is called Coyote Canyon, doesn’t mean that there’s only coyotes there. Bunny Burrows was home to more than just bunnies, the predominantly sheep filled Meadowlands district wasn’t limited to only sheep, there were exceptions everywhere.

One major exception that existed in Coyote Canyon though, wasn’t even a canine…that exception existing In the form of a large mountain lion, currently sleeping the day away on a large comfy couch in his apartment, the stone walls doing a good job echoing the sounds of his heavy snoring. Luckily, the walls were either thick enough to keep the sound down, or his neighbors simply weren’t around to suffer through the feline’s snoring. The cat continued to snooze the day away, no end seen in the near future…that is…until a light clicking sound came from the front door. The large cat snorted slightly in his sleep, his ears flicking from the sound of someone at his door…he shifted momentarily, sniffing the air before growling as he tried to stay asleep.

The sound at the door continued for a few moments longer, soft muttering heard at the other side of the door before finally the lock finally clicked and the cat heard the door swing open. The cat grumbled softly, snuggling into the warm cushions of his sofa as he heard some mammal shuffle into the apartment, plastic bags and their contents crumpling, squeaking, and clapping together as the front door closed and the mammal walked by.

The cat stayed silent, ignoring the sounds the intruder made, ignoring how close they had gotten to him, the sound of them putting things away in the kitchen…he just stayed there, doing his best to either fall back asleep…or pretend to continue sleeping. After a few moments though, a voice rang out from the kitchen. “I know you’re awake man.”

“No….no you don’t…” The cat grumbled while nuzzling the cushions.

“You’re talking to me.” The voice replied with a soft chuckle.

“I’m sleep talking…”

“Sleep talkers don’t have conversations.”

“I do…”

“Yeah whatever…oh, by the way, they were all out of your salmon bacon, so I got you some anchovy paste instead. That cool?”

“WHAT?!” The cat roared, immediately sitting up and turning his head towards the kitchen. “You piece of-” Before the cat could finish his statement, his eyes honed in on a small wrapped up plastic package, thin strips of pink meat inside with a picture of a smiling pink salmon printed across the plastic. The package currently in the paw of a dark brown furred canine, his fur dark enough to nearly appear black, with similar dark brown eyes, smirking as he slowly waved the treat.

“Gotcha bro…” He seemed to be a coyote…but he was slightly larger and fluffier than coyotes tended to be.

The cat groaned, immediately collapsing back onto the couch while the canine laughed. “You know better than to tease about my bacon…” The cat mumbled into the cushion.

“Hey, it got your attention didn’t it? And for your information, I wasn’t joking.” The canine continued putting away the groceries he had carried into the apartment, successfully putting them all away before pulling a pair of energy drinks out of the fridge. “The store was out….AND I nearly did have to get you something else…” The coyote walked over to the couch, raising an eyebrow at the cat that had claimed the entire piece of furniture for himself. “C’mon bro make some room.” He motioned with a can filled paw to the cat.

“No…”

“The couch isn’t your bed man.”

“Yeah it is…”

“No, your bed is in the other room.”

“I’ll gladly give up my bed for this sofa….we can rent my room out to someone else…” the cat suggested, smirking slightly from his own idea.

“Not happening bro, now come on, it’s been a long day, I want some comfy couch time too.”

“Nope.” The cat muttered, stretching out more before cuddling into the cushions

“If you don’t move, I’m gonna sit on you.”

“Try it and I’ll claw you.” The cat growled, face buried in the cushions.

“Sitting down!” The canine called out, the cat turning slightly, but before he could react he felt the slightly smaller male plop down right on his back, earning a loud yelp from the feline.

“OW!” The cat groaned, feeling the canine slowly adjust himself on top of him. “Get….off!”

“Mmmmmm…” The canine stretched a little bit before reclining back against the cushions. “You’re right bro, this couch is super comfy…”

“HADE! Get off me!”

“You gonna make some room if I do?” The canine pulled the one can close, cracking it open before taking a long drawn out sip. “Or am I gonna stay here all day?”

“I’m serious!”

“Me too…” The canine sipped his drink again and smirked looking down to the cat. “Heads up bro….better choose quick…I hit up Bug-Burga before getting groceries…and I’m feeling a tad…gassy…if you catch my drift…”

“HADE!”

“Hold that thought…I feel one coming on bro…” The dark red canine raised his leg slightly, letting out a grunt before yelping as the cat managed to push up and knock the canine off him. “Well that certainly got you up.” The canine chuckled, climbing up to his paws and ignoring the death stare the cat gave him, moving over and plopping onto a bit of room that the cat had unintentionally given up. “Lazy cat…”

“Dumb mutt…”

“Hey, I know I’m a cross, but that’s just uncalled for.” The canine pointed to the cougar, reaching down and grabbing the second can he had grabbed from the fridge before tossing it to the cat. “After all the junk I do for you.” The mountain lion rolled his eyes, popping the energy drink open while the canine held up his paw. “I let you move in with me, I try to hook you up with jobs, I get us groceries…” He pointed to the mountain lion. “They really were out of bacon at the shop, but me being the awesome bro I am, I went all the way to Tundra Town to get you some of the real good stuff. Freshly delivered and cut up this morning, all for you my man.”

“Oooooo…you went all the way to the other side of the wall…” The mountain lion rolled his eyes as he chugged his energy drink before burping. “Real impressive man.”

“Tell me about it!” The canine shivered slightly. “I mean, I thought this place got cold late at night…Tundra Town….yeeeesh…” He sipped his drink again before looking to the cougar. “You know, I think they actually have their own version of this place over there….but it’s all ice canyons instead of stone…I’d hate to live there…”

“Don’t be such a wimp dude…” The cougar rolled his eyes, lowering his drink while stretching out a bit, having his pain in the…well…back, in this case, roommate hop onto him and interrupt his much needed sleep had left him understandably sore.

“Hey, is that any way to thank me?”

“It works.”

“Well then, maybe you can be the one to go out shopping for groceries from now on.” The canine stretched a little bit himself, before leaning down to place his now empty can on the floor by his paws.

“Can’t.” The cat replied flatly, crumpling his now empty can before tossing it towards the kitchen.

“And why’s that?” The canine asked with a sideways glance to his roommate, hitting the remote and starting to flip through the channels while the large cat gave him a slight shrug.

“Busy…” He muttered as he placed his paws behind his head.

“Dooooooing….what exactly?” The coyote shifted slightly in his seat, continuing to flip through the channels.

“Stuff.”

“Right…” The canine, apparently named Hade, rolled his eyes, tapping away at the remote as he tried looking for something interesting to watch.

“What’s that tone for?” The cat asked, sitting up a bit and raising an eyebrow as the canine shrugged.

“Nothing man…” The canine mumbled, glancing to the cat before rolling his eyes. “Just…” He sighed shaking his head before offering him the remote. “I dunno…”

“Dunno what?” The cat pulled up a show centered around amazing failures and wipeouts before setting the remote down. “You’re being weird man.”

The canine stared at the television a bit before sighing as he stroked his face. “Look man…we’re bros…I’m cool with you hanging around and being buds…there’s no one else I’d rather have as my roommate.”

“I can think of one animal you’d probably prefer.” The cat smirked elbowing his friend only to pause as Hade looked to him with a growl. “Jeez, chill man I was just joking.” He muttered, holding up a paw while sliding away a bit.

“I am chill…” The coyote groaned shaking his head before putting his face into his paw. “Look…man…you can’t just hang around my place anymore…”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” The cat raised an eyebrow.

“You know what it means…” The canine lowered his paw, inhaling deeply before sighing. “Look man…you HAVE to get a job.”

“This again?” The cat groaned, rolling his eyes before yelping as the dog punched his arm. “Ow! What the heck man?”

“I’m serious!” Hade growled. “You’ve bummed with me for way to long as it is. You need to get out of this apartment, get a job, make some money….” He frowned as the cat rolled his eyes. “Some real money, no scams, no cons, no…under the table jobs…”

“The heck’s this all coming from?” The mountain lion growled while looking away. “I make money…I do jobs…I just do them at night.”

“Doing ‘jobs’ with that bobcat doesn’t count…” The canine sighed, pushing up off the couch and grabbing their empty cans as he walked off into the kitchen. “If you don’t get a job…a LEGIT job…” The canine paused, looking back, biting his lip before finally speaking. “Then I’m kicking you out….”

That certainly got the cat’s attention, his jaw dropping and hanging open. “Y….you’re joking man.”

“Nope…” the canine’s voice came from inside the kitchen.

“H…Hade…c’mon man, it’s me, we’re bros, you can’t kick me out.” The cat chuckled nervously, hoping this was all some sort of joke.

“I can…” The canine sighed as he came back out and leaned against the doorframe of the kitchen. “And I will if I have too.”

The mountain lion stared in complete shock, slowly pushing up off the couch and approached the smaller canine. “Dude…you can’t! We’ve been pals since we were cubs! Or…kitten and pup….” He laughed nervously, the canine not seeming to waver so the cat frowned. “You can’t throw me out! Not after all we’ve been through, the good times, the bad times, all the jobs, all the…all the shit!” He growled as he poked the canine’s chest. “I was there for you when that little hussy broke your heart!” the big cat growled staring down the shorter canine, but he didn’t show any sign of backing down either.

“And I was there for YOU, when Ginger left….” The canine frowned, smacking the cat’s paw away from his chest, noticing the cat instantly recoil from the mere mention of that name, instinctively softening himself.  “Look…I don’t want to do it…but I can’t AFFORD to let you stay here anymore man…” Hade sighed, crossing his arms as he looked up to the cat. “The rent here isn’t exactly cheap. I’m struggling to make ends meet on my own as it is…buying groceries for my bum roommate, and paying the extra bills from you staying here…I’m in a real tough spot…so either you start splitting the rent…I kick you out…or we both go out on the street…” The canine pushed past the cat, heading to one of the closed doors before sighing. “You have a week man…get a job… help me start paying the bills…or I’m going to have to kick you out and find a new roommate…”

He tried to pull his door open but stopped as the cougar hurried over to him. “Hade…c’mon…Where am I gonna get a job on such short notice?”

The canine frowned, leaning his shoulder against the door to his room. “What happened to all those jobs listings I gave you?”

“Uhhhhhh….” The cougar silently ran his claw through the fur on his head. “I…uh…may or may not have thrown them out…or shred them…or…used them as placemats…or napkins…”

“Dude…” The canine groaned, facepawing as he let out a loud groan. “See, this is what I mean!” He lowered his paw and pointed to the cougar. “You don’t appreciate any of the shit I’ve done for you!”

“What? Of course I appreciate it!”

“Then you would’ve checked out those job listings I gave you!”

“I…wasn’t looking for a job…”

“You would have at least KEPT them.” The canine growled. “Look bro…I’m done…One week from today…the second I get home from work…either you pay me…or you pack your things and get out…” The canine pushed his door open, taking a deep breath before speaking again. “I’m sorry Fe…” He sighed, walking into the room before slamming the door shut behind him.

The cat stood there a few moments, completely stunned before groaning as he raised his paws up to his face. “Dammit…” He groaned, walking over to the couch before collapsing over it. “I’m screwed…” He muttered, reaching into his pocket and fishing out his phone. He had no idea where to start…no clue who would hire him…he was really regretting tossing out all those job offers his roommate had given him before. He silently scrolled through his phone, looking at his contacts, but paused as he felt his phone vibrate with a new message from…Hade…The cat sat up a bit, looking to the door the canine had disappeared behind before frowning. “Can’t even talk to me anymore man?” He called, not getting a response as he opened up the message and froze.

‘Felinus…She wouldn’t want you to be moping around my apartment all day…you know that…I let you stay because I wanted to help you pull yourself together after she left…but it’s gone on too long. Ginger WILL come back one day….and what would she think if she saw you like this? Jobless, homeless, bumming around my apartment all day, living off me and whatever I can scrounge together for you…She’d be disappointed…she’d be disgusted…and you’d NEVER get the chance to come clean with her…when she left, I made a promise to watch out for you….I’ve done all I can for you…now it’s your turn. Clean yourself up, get out there, get a job, get some money, be the type of cat she’ll be proud of when she comes back…A cat who can FINALLY mammal up and tell her how he’s felt about her since the day he met her …’

The cat stared silently at his phone for a few moments, shaking slightly before growling as he squeezed his phone in his paw. After a few moments longer he let out a loud roar of…he didn’t even know what emotion to call it…anger…sadness…disgust…self-loathing…maybe all those wrapped together into one with a few others tossed in for good measure…he didn’t know. After roaring the emotions out though, the cat took a few deep breaths before pushing himself off the couch before approaching another closed door…the one right beside Hade’s, his room…he shoved his way into the room before slamming the door shut behind him.